Es geht auf eine Reise

Die Koffer sind gepackt… naja, fast. OK, erwischt, ich muss heute noch damit anfangen, damit ich morgen auf große Reise gehen kann. Doch wie heißt es so schön: “Nur kein Stress!” besonders, wenn einem die Multiple Sklerose im Nacken sitzt und auf Stress immer ziemlich zickig reagiert. Ein Grund mehr, nervös zu sein, bei dieser Reise. Doch lasst mich von Vorne beginnen. Ich nehme euch mit zurück in die Vergangenheit – in meine Kindheit.

Ich muss in etwa so alt gewesen sein, wie mein Sohn jetzt ist. Der damals noch junge und quietschfidele Chris fuhr mit seinem Papa auf große Fahrt. Einen Roadtrip – nur wir zwei Männer. Es ging nach England und dort fuhren wir ohne größeren Plan einfach drauf los. Stonehenge wollte ich schon immer sehen – also nichts wie hin. Und wenn der Abend kam, suchten wir ein Bed&Breakfast, um dort zu nächtigen, fragten nach neuen, aufregenden Zielen in der Nähe und entdeckten die Insel. Hoch nach Schottland, Zurück über Nottingham – einmal ganz rum. Es war schön und mir hat diese Reise mit meinem Papa so viel bedeutet, dass ich mein ganzes Leben immer wieder daran gedacht habe, davon erzählte oder in Erinnerungen schwelgte. Als mein Sohn dann auf die Welt kam, wollte ich natürlich auch mit ihm irgendwann eine solche Reise machen. Als er vor ein paar Wochen äußerte, dass er gerne Stonehenge sehen wollte, kam mir eine erschreckende Erkenntnis: “Ich kann nicht mehr Auto fahren…”

Wie der Zufall es wollte, kam nach der Erkenntnis das Grillen bei meinem Papa. Wir quatschten, ich erzählte von der traurigen Tatsache, dass ich mit meinem Söhnchen wohl nicht mehr eine solche Reise erleben kann und es traf mich wie ein Blitz. Warum machen wir keinen 3-Generationen-Roadtrip daraus? Opa, Papa, Enkel und ganz viel Großbritannien zum Entdecken. Scheinbar war mein Papa sofort Feuer und Flamme, denn bereits am Folgetag zu meiner fixen Idee, hatte er einen Plan parat, machte sich Gedanken über Ziele und wie wir das am besten schaffen können – rechnete im Kopf den Platz im Auto aus und versuchte meinen Rollstuhl dort irgendwo unterzubringen.

Morgen ist es soweit. Es geht los. Die Koffer sind gepackt… nein, den Punkt hatte ich ja schon berichtigt. Sie sind im Kopf gepackt – nur die Umsetzung fehlt noch. Söhnchen ist bereit und muss nur noch seiner Playstation “Goodbye” wünschen und schon kann die Reise beginnen. Und plötzlich habe ich Angst. Sicherlich sind die Herausforderungen dieser Reise nun schon seit längerem bekannt. Opa und Enkel schmieden fleißig Pläne, an welcher Steilklippe sie am besten den Rollstuhl loslassen und mir beim Flug zusehen können und ich reibe mir boshaft lachend die Hände, wenn ich daran denke, dass die beiden meinen wohlgeformten Körper auf Rädern die Berge hochschieben müssen. Aber neben all diesem Spaß gibt es ja auch ernstzunehmende Herausforderungen. Was ist, wenn es mir plötzlich schlecht geht? Wenn die Fatique zuschlägt und ich nur noch schlafen möchte? Wie erkläre ich einem Arzt, dass ich Multiple Sklerose habe und wie meine Symptome aussehen? Kommt ein Schub?

Ich schiebe die Ängste einfach mal zur Seite… vielleicht ähnlich dem Packen des Koffers. Alles zu seiner Zeit. Ich freue mich im Moment viel mehr über unseren Roadtrip und ansonsten heißt es: “Was in England passiert, bleibt in England!” (Naja, vielleicht berichte ich doch ein klein wenig davon hinterher.)

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